Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Affirmation of Life

I was listening to the audio version of Debbie Macomber's "The Shop on Blossom Street" yesterday afternoon while having a mini meltdown, cleaning the oven (How's that for temptation when you're freaking out?! Don't worry, our's is electric!), loading the dishwasher and making baked ziti for dinner. Thanks to YahooChat, I was able to work through my little episode (another post, perhaps) and regain some sense of sanity!

Then what I was listening to seemed to jump out at me through the speakers! Made me stop what I was doing and listen to it again.

"You said you started this shop as an affirmation of life."
I nodded. "I did-" Margaret didn't allow me to finish.
"Then LIVE. Get involved in life, Lydia..."
"Live, Lydia," she said again. "Get out there and find out what life's all about. And do it before you shrivel up - or die."
(from page 143 of the paperback)

Hearing this jump started me. Startled me as well. I'd been telling myself off and on for years that I am not really living my life. Since being with Hubby, he'd been telling me the same. And things are so different for me now! What's my excuse?

What is my affirmation of life?

Last night I read the following while looking for the above so I could underline it in the book:
"Why not?"
"I-"
"You keep telling me this shop of yours is an affirmation of life."
"Yes, I know, but-"
"Well, why don't you put your money where your mouth is."
It distressed me that my sister seemed to enjoy harrassing me. "It's my life, Margaret."
"LIFE?" She said scornfully. "What life? All you do is work and knit, which is your work..."
..."Why not?"
I wasn't sure why I was so adamant. "Because..."
"You're afraid."
"All right, I'm afraid," I almost shouted, "but that doesn't change anything."
"Get over it."
"Oh, Margaret, you make everything seem so easy."
(from page 176 of the paperback)

Insert Victor for Margaret & change the 'all you do is' and there you have a bit of what's been thrown out between us from time to time, nearly word for word!

At this moment, I don't know what my affirmation of life is. I do know that since last night, I have wanted to post about this and journal about it as well. Just to get it out there.

My question for all of you, my dear friends and readers is this: Do you have an affirmation of life? If so, what is it?

8 comments:

windy city girl said...

Good question. I guess my affirmation of life - which comes and goes (lol) - is the restlessness in me. I like to think of it as God trying to nudge me in the direction she's always had in mind for me. But I still have to make the necessary steps. It'll take some time, of course. I'm a timid person at heart, but I think listening to that restless voice within is what affirms life for me.

Jo said...

Thank you for sharing that G. I really appreciate it. I have a similar restless voice inside of me as well.

Kalanna said...

sooooo, this is going to sound totally sentimental and sappy, but hanging out around CoL has been an affirmation of life for me.

my thoughts go like this: finding goodreads at all was like an answer to something my heart needed, then finding the group i could connect with best in amongst ALL of those users was another answer. almost as if my heart went looking for what it needed without me knowing what it needed and that gives me a great deal of hope. in my heart and for my life.

Holli said...

WONDERFUL post Jo....I'm glad you put this out there. I do agree with what your book (and Vic) are telling you---GET OUT THERE AND LIVE. Fear does nothing but you hold you back from happiness. Life deserves to be lived fully with hurt and anger and peace and love all mixed together. The unknown is only scary if you let it be scary...have some faith in yourself, in Vic, and in whatever higher power you believe in and KNOW that you will be ok.

Jo said...

Holli, you are such an amazing 'cheerleader'! Thank you. Your support means so much to me!

Kalanna, that doesn't sound corny in the least! I feel so incredibly Blessed to have the ladies of CoL in my life and I know I have come a long way in this last year as a result of their unconditional, loving frienships and support. (Thanks to my bff G up there once again for telling me about GoodReads! I doubt she or I could've guessed the impact it would have on me!)

teri said...

It sounds like Victor realizes you may not be feeling completely fulfilled with your life as you are currently living it and that you are accepting what he is saying. But it's hard to be courageous as an adult when as a child you have been warned many times to be cautious!

Maybe your affirmation, whatever it is, could include baby steps, as you learn to walk all over again -- this time with your husband by your side and leaving your parents' warnings behind. Go get 'em, Jo!

Lizzi said...

Jo, I think this sentiment is in the air. I've been asking myself the same questions lately. Spring always brings me a certain restlesness, a certain wondering what my life is all about. All I know is that life is meant to be lived out loud. I think you post is an affirmation of life. It takes time to realize how much life has to offer and how much you have to offer life. And Jo, I know you have a ton to offer life!

Holli is right...you have to have the sweet and the bitter, the joy and the anger, and peace and love. Teri is right too...you realize when you grow up the rules have changed and you have to be courageous over the leftover warnings in your head.

Jo said...

Teri wrote: "But it's hard to be courageous as an adult when as a child you have been warned many times to be cautious!

...as you learn to walk all over again -- this time with your husband by your side and leaving your parents' warnings behind."

That is amazing and certainly part of it for me Teri! Thank you for understanding.

And thank you Lizzi for your support too!

I know I have at least 2 affirmation of life right off the bat:

This blog. I've been at it for over 3 years now. As times goes on, I get more fulfillment from it and what I do with it. I enjoy it so!

And

Gardening. Nothing makes me feel more connected in Spirit, in life, in nature, than gardening. It comforts me so when I'm in pain. It gives me pure, unadulterated joy.