Friday, November 13, 2009

Crisis Calling

What am I doing? WHAT AM I DOING?!

I'm talking writing here.

Why am I stalling?

Why do I just keep dreaming instead of acting on those dreams?

What's stopping me? WHY AM I STOPPING ME?!

I'm actually scared.

Apparently I can't just write whenever the hell I want to because I don't write often enough.

And I suck with discipline.

But I love to write.

So where does this leave me?

Changes and upheaval are abound. I feel myself heading into a tail spin. A bit of a crisis. An identity crisis? A writing crisis? More than one crisis is on the horizon here, I'm pretty sure of that much.

And this whole Sister-in-law thing isn't helping me right now. Or is that why I'm feeling like this in the first place? I feel like I'm counting down my days until her arrival in the back of my mind. I was looking forward to going down to Philly for the day, because, as you all know by now that I love Philly and any excuse to get me down there. But now even that idea isn't helping. Damnit.


Something positive: I added something on the subtle side to my header/banner above. It came to me last night while I was reading the new issue of Artful Blogging, always a source of inspiration and refreshment for me. Because that's what I've been doing, trying to do, for so many years.

(Stephanie Meyer never wrote anything before writing Twilight. From when she first started writing it until it was published and on store shelves was 2 years and 3 months. She only received 9 agent rejections, 1 who wanted to read more and 5 no replies. And of course there are the movies of at least 2 of the Twilight series. Watching her on Oprah today was not a good idea).


Lisa said...

I'm stuck on writing, too. I've got a great book idea and am well into it but the impetus of the female lead's actions mirrors something that happened in my own life. I can't write it because if it ever did amount to anything I couldn't let my parents read it. And I can't get past that project. So frustrating!

teri said...

Oh I dunno, I think you write an awful lot and very well. Maybe you need some inspiration. Have you looked on postsecret? Every time I go to that site I think "there are a hundred storylines here..."

Jo said...

Lisa, I've had that problem at times too because, I feel, when something's based on personal experience, we are so close to it, it's difficult to write about.

Thank you Teri, I really appreciate that. Inspiration perhaps. Direction most likely. I'll look into postsecret, I've never heard of it before. Thanks for the suggestion.

Lizzi said...

All creators go through ups and downs and dry spells and total confusion about where they are and what they're doing and where they're going. Have you ever tried writing something that is so removed from you? It helps me when I'm kind of out of sorts creativity-wise.

Jo said...

Interesting Lizzi, I haven't tried that before. Thank you for the suggestion.